Archive for fatwa

Muslim Snowmen Fatwa

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on December 28, 2019 by andelino

Religious Fatwa scholar Mohammad Saleh Al Minjed.

A “snowfall” covered upland areas of Tabuk province near Saudi Arabia’s border with Jordan for the “third” consecutive year, which saw Saudis eagerly drawing on their “imagination and sense of fun” as they braved the cold weather to build “snowmen” and “snow camels” in a tribute to the local culture.

Citizens in the Province of Tarif used “snow camels” to promote the “colors” of local teams, drawing “praise” from the fans.

Another opted for the traditional “ghitra and agal” to cover the head of the “snowman” she built.

However, it was not all “fun” for Saudis after a religious scholar said that building “snowmen or snow animals” was “haram” and not acceptable in Islam.

The fatwa, by Mohammad Saleh Al Minjed, said that “building snowmen or any replica of an animal, even if it is for fun or recreation, could not be condoned. Only lifeless things, such as ships, fruit and buildings could be imitated.”

Religious Fatwa scholar Mohammad Saleh Al Minjed trying his new, lifeless black metal skies he got for Christmas.

No date was mentioned about when the “fatwa” was issued, but it was widely circulated on “social” networks, triggering a wide and often heated “online” debate mainly among Gulf nationals.

Those who “supported” the fatwa said that building snowmen was a “crude imitation of the West.”

“Building snowmen is imitating the infidels, it promotes lustiness and eroticism. May Allah preserve the scholars, for they enjoy sharp vision and recognize matters that even Satan does not think about,” one wrote.

Blogger Al Marsad wrote: “It has no value in our traditions. Those fascinated by the West should emulate their inventions and sciences, not their culture.”

The fatwa, or “religious” ruling, was given a “frosty reception” on social media sites by some people.

Blogger Mishaal complained that the ruling took the “joy” out of the unusual weather. “We have snow for fleeting days, maybe even hours, and there is always someone who wants to rob us of the joy and the fun. It seems that the only thing left for us is to sit down and drink coffee.”

On Twitter users writing in Arabic and identifying themselves with Arab names joined in the debate.

“They are afraid for their faith of everything … sick minds,” one Twitter user wrote.

Another posted a photo of a man in formal Arab garb holding the arm of a “snow bride wearing a bra and lipstick. The reason for the ban is fear of sedition,” he wrote.

A third said the country was plagued by two types of people: “A people looking for a fatwa for everything in their lives, and a cleric who wants to interfere in everything in the lives of others through a fatwa,” he wrote.

Last year the “General Authority of Islamic Affairs and Endowment” (GAIAE) in the UAE issued a fatwa against living on “Mars.” The committee argued that an attempt to “dwell on the planet would be so hazardous as to be suicidal, and killing oneself is not permitted by Islam.”

“The astronauts, the committee said, would end up dying for no righteous reason and would face the same punishment in the afterlife as someone who’d committed suicide.” 

The GAIAE has issued around two million “Fatwa’s” through its Official Fatwa Center since its inception in 2008.

In Malaysia, meanwhile, Muslim clerics have issued fatwa’s banning everything from “Yoga to Valentine’s Day” in a bid to stop the “influence” of Western culture.

To ensure Muslims can keep pace with the rules, an “e-fatwa” site has been started. The issue recently came to a head at a “dog petting” festival for Muslims, with the organizer receiving threatening phone calls since “Muslims are taught that canines are unclean.”

Malaysian activist Zainah Anwar, recently wrote that Muslims are “sick and tired of being told, yet again, of more categories of Muslims and practices to be denounced, hated and declare deviant.”

Her women’s rights group, “Sisters in Islam,” has also been targeted. It was issued with a “fatwa” for pushing “liberalism.” It had pushed for Muslim women to be able to enter “beauty pageants.” The group were challenging the ruling.

The list of fatwa’s now includes, “Halloween” which is said to be too Christian and “black metal” because it is “powerful enough to force a Muslim to forsake his faith.”

“Botox” is banned, but can be used if “medically” necessary.

“Remember this winter don’t make snowmen or you will be among the most severely punished people by Allah. pic.twitter.com/Jcj0g1GB1U — Ex-Muslims of North America (@ExmuslimsOrg) December 25, 2019

Anybody that sees “lust and eroticism” in a snowman must be one “horny” Muslim dude. Is there anything these “goat shaggers” like about Western countries?”

Eating Wife Is Halal

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , , on April 20, 2015 by andelino

Eating Wife Is Halal 00

Saudi Arabia’s highest religious authority has issued a “fatwa” allowing a starving man to eat his wife in order to “save” himself, causing a “stir” among the Kingdom’s residents.

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Grand Mufti Sheikh Abdul Aziz Al-Sheikh said that the “act” would display the wife’s “obedience” to her husband and her “willingness” to become “one with his flesh.”

Clarifying his “stance,” Abdul Aziz bin Abdullah explains that “literally” eating your wife is permitted only if you’re “extremely” hungry.

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Grand Mufti Sheikh Abdul Aziz Al-Sheikh.

Translating what “appeared” on multiple Arab websites here, here, here, here and here:

“A fatwa attributed to the Mufti of Saudi Arabia, Abdul Aziz bin Abdullah, which allows a man to eat his wife or parts of her body if the husband was afflicted with a severe hunger raised concern and debate over social media since yesterday evening. The Fatwa is interpreted as evidence of the sacrifice of women and obedience to her husband and her desire for the two to become one.”

Saudi “Twitter” users quickly took to the “social network” to express their “shock” at the strange fatwa “attributed” to the Grand Mufti.

Women walk past members of Saudi security forces as they keep guard in Manfouha, southern Riyadh

Following the report Saudi media “accused” Iranian media of “fabricating” the fatwa, noting that the “fatwa” was not on the “official website.”

The Grand Mufti had previously issued “controversial” fatwa’s, such as a “decree” permitting the marriage of “minors” under the age of 15.

Saudi Arabia follows the “ultra” conservative “Wahhabi” school of Sunni Islam.

Last year, Al-Sheikh came out against ISIS and al-Qaida, saying they were “enemy number one of Islam” and not in any way “part of the faith.”

“Extremist and militant ideas and terrorism which spread decay on Earth, destroying human civilization, are not in any way part of Islam, but are enemy number one of Islam, and Muslims are their first victims,” he said in a statement.

The only thing that “really” surprises me is that they are “blaming” the Iranian media.

That’s a “refreshing” change from the usual of “blaming” the Jews.

At a time where the world is looking for Islam to emerge to challenge the “barbaric and extremist” beliefs and practices of organizations like ISIS, comes a Mufti from Saudi who thinks declaring your wife a “snack on the menu” as being helpful.

One can only hope this old, incompetent “cannibal” is reprimanded for his fatwa. That being said I think “eating” your spouse is “haram.”

While many object, and if in doubt that Islam permits cannibalism, read here, here, here and here. There are many more, but I did not want to “ruin your appetite.”

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Muslims in Ramallah hold body parts of Israeli while they cry out “I eat the flesh of my occupier!”

Here is an actual photo of Palestinians in Ramallah “eating” human flesh.

Hungry? Go ahead, eat your wife
Saudi cleric issued fatwa allowing starving husbands to eat wives

Jihad Anal Love

Posted in sex with tags , , , , , , , , , on March 7, 2015 by andelino

Anal Jihad 01

Raymond Ibrahim reports about a new “fatwa” that explicitly legitimizes sodomy and even makes it “obligatory” if it helps to wage “Jihad” on the unbelievers.

An Arabic “news” video has made the rounds on the Internet, in which an Islamic scholar “earnestly” informs jihadists of an “innovative and unprecedented way to execute martyrdom by placing explosive capsules in the anus.”

However, to undertake this “jihadi” approach you must agree to be “sodomized” for a while to widen your anus “so it can hold the explosives.”

“Ass-Sahab” present the “Al-Qaeda Training Video”:

Full Video Transcript:

Are you a “sexually” frustrated young man? Then you’ve come to the right place. Hi, I am Ayman al-Zawahiri, Osama bin Laden’s “backdoor” man.

You may remember me from such instructional videos as “Five Terrific Reasons to Blow Yourself Up” and “Al Qaeda Martyrs’ Excellent Retirement Plan.”

In this “video” I want to talk to you about creating “butt” bombs.

Did you know that the word “ASS-ASS-IN” comes from the Middle East? What social “loser” wouldn’t like to take one in the “ass” for Allah?

Become a “butt-bomber” in five easy steps with this “butt-stuffing” instructions.

Have your butt buddy “get you off” with a text message while you have your final “orgasmic” experience of a lifetime.

“Ass-assassination” will never feel the same again.

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Al Qaeda: We shove bombs up our butts!

Step 1: Explosives.

If you have been watching my series you know how to make explosives. But because this one will go up your butt you must mix it with polymers to stiffen it up for ease of insertion, and mold it into the only shape that Allah provided to get the job done.

Make it smooth, textured, or lovingly bumpy, but make sure it is a perfect fit for you. Before you decide on the width and length, insert a vegetable, like carrot or cucumber up your bung and walk with it. Don’t be afraid to play Goldilocks and try different sizes. Something too long may create the tent-pole phenomenon in the back of your pants.

When you make calculations, don’t confuse the circumference with the diameter. We don’t want you to become jaded and go on a mission with a defeatist attitude or with impossibly high expectations.

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Step 2: Lubricants.

KY Jelly or rendered rancid sheep fat? You may find that KY dries rather rapidly. Of course use rendered rancid sheep fat! That way there will be no unfamiliar smell to give you away. It will also throw off the sniffing dogs. It is safe unless the airports start fluoroscoping all travelers with Preparation H.

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I knew a butt-bomber, a very sweet young man, who went for spicy cinnamon oil to avoid the bomb detectors. But they spotted him because of the squirming. The bomb was withdrawn prematurely.

Some believe that petroleum-based lubricants offer the best secondary explosion, but that is an old wife’s tale. Even water-based brands contain ingredients to enhance the incendiary effect, with or without the warming sensation.

Glycerin can be found in KY Jelly, Sylk, Astroglide, Probe, and Aqua lube. But be careful because the sugar can encourage yeast growth. Stop using any product that causes skin irritation.

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Step 3: Preparation “stop worrying and learn to love the bomb”

Find yourself a butt buddy. For starters let him send a gerbil up your bung through the cardboard tubing from a paper towel roll. It will widen your bomb-storage facility and make you accustomed to the pleasure and accept it as desirable.

Then take turns practicing with Doc Johnson Pocket Rocket. It always hits my sweet spot. But of course modern technology has created masterpieces that rotate, vibrate, thrust, jiggle, wiggle, squirt, and simply bring out a wilder side to anyone who uses them. Be creative. Some use al-Qaeda anal beads, but they’re not for everybody.

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When you get good at it, proceed with Allah “Fisting!” Show your dedication to Allah by opening up to Him! But tell your “butt” buddy to remove his ring.

Make it closer to field conditions by inserting a telephone set on vibrate. You’ll find it fun once you get past the buttons. Or is it the other way around? It’s undetectable and hands free. You can even learn to send and receive secret messages. How do you think I have avoided the CIA for so long?

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The possibilities are endless! Do you see my AK 47 rifle behind my back? No? I didn’t think so. It fits completely, but it takes time to pull it out. In my other videos I have bookshelves in the background. I could pull them out too. Maybe for the next video. I like to keep my Koran and Hadith handy, so to speak.

Step 4: The big Orgasm.

A wise man said, go West, young man, and blow up with the country! By all means! Stick the bomb up your butt and go! The thought of a butt bomb can be scary to some. But you will find yourself having a fun time if you follow my advice.

Think of it as a blind date. Don’t be late. Check your calendar. Remember that the Ramadan Fast provides us with extra bomb storage. Cancel all appointments and keep the phone lines clear. Pray to Allah that no one will text you a random joke and your Mom doesn’t call you to ask about the condition of your butt itch.

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Play it safe by going off in a public place. Wear clothes that give you confidence. Carrying penis-shaped explosives in your butt can be stressful enough, so you better feel like you’re at the top of your game. Choose a location that is free of mushy memories.

And you don’t want a spot where you might run into an old friend from school or a relative. This can make things awkward, especially if you start exchanging phone numbers. They may try to test it and send you a text message. That could be embarrassing.

Step 5: Paradise.

This is the part where you stop worrying. Your training has prepared you for an eternity of pleasures. Meet the 72 houris. Allah willing you won’t be fit for any other recreational activity.

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There may not be any lubricants, but there sure will be plenty of sand. With your extra-wide rectum you’ll be one happy martyr. Others will not be so lucky.

And that is the whole point of becoming a “butt” bomber. 100% Halal.

Anal Jihad is in the focus of reluctant public attention again, three years after a half-assed attempt at assassination of a Saudi official with a pound of explosives stuck up a jihadist’s rectum.

So let’s shout a hearty “Allahu Akbar” for the “butthole” bombers and “goat” humpers.

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No wonder Jihadists “stick” bombs up their butts if this is what Jihadists “pussies” look like.

Sex Jihad Fatwa

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , on May 8, 2014 by andelino

Sex Jihad Fatwa 02Hat Tip: “Sex Jihad” Fatwa Permits Incest in Syria

Last year, according to Arabic media accounts, “Saudi cleric Nasser al-‘Umar issued a fatwa permitting mujahidin [jihadis] in Syria to have sex-jihad with their sisters [muharamhum] if no one else is available.”

“The Saudi preacher also praised the mujahidin for their ongoing fight against, in his words, the machine of infidelity and oppression, that is, the Syrian and Iranian regimes.”

Sex Jihad Fatwa 01The cleric issued his fatwa on “one of the channels associated with the radical jihadi movements” where he also reportedly said: “Some today are opposing the fatwa’s being issued by the clerics which serve our mujahidin brethren fighting in Syria [a likely reference to Muslim criticism—as opposed to Western denial—of the sexjihad fatwa’s], without criticizing the killing of children and women in Syria.”

As shocking as this report may seem, it is not the first of its kind.

For example, according to this Arabic documentary video (click “cc” for English subtitles), “The new jihad allows brothers and sisters in Syria belonging to the [al-Qaeda linked] al-Nusra Front to marry each other under the name of jihad because of the lack of girls among fighters of that organization.”

One man appears on video saying, “At the Zawia mountain there is an imam called Imam Hussein. They bring him a brother and a sister, he says ‘Allahu Akbar’ on them three times to have sex together and make them husband and wife.”

The rationale and justification of these fatwa’s is based on the Islamic maxim, “necessity makes the prohibited permissible,” not unlike the more familiar adage, “the ends justify the means.”

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In other words, because fighting to make the “word of Allah,” or Sharia, supreme is the greatest good, and because “sexually deprived” jihadis fighting to do just that may lose “morale” and quit the “theater of war” for lack of women, it is permissible, indeed laudable, for Muslim women—including apparently relatives—to volunteer to give up their bodies to these men so that they can continue the jihad to empower Islam, in accordance with the Koran: “Allah has purchased of the believers their persons and their goods; for theirs (in return) is the garden (of Paradise): they fight in His cause, and slay and are slain” (Yusuf Ali trans. 9:111).

This verse has been traditionally understood as Muslim men selling “their persons,” that is, their bodies, to the jihad in exchange for paradise. In the context of sex jihad, however, Muslim women—including sisters—are also selling “their persons” (their bodies for sex) to indirectly empower the jihad, also in exchange for paradise.

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The fact is, the maxim, “necessity makes the prohibited permissible,” is responsible for any number of seeming contradictions:

“Muslim women must chastely be covered head-to-toe—yet, in the service of jihad, they are allowed to prostitute their bodies.”

“Homosexuality is forbidden—but permissible if rationalized as a way to kill infidels.”

“Lying is forbidden—but permissible to empower Islam.”

“Suicide is forbidden—but permissible during the jihad—called “martyrdom.”

“Stealing is forbidden—but the rightful booty of the jihadi who conquers infidels.”

The moral of the story?

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Sharia is only draconian and rigid for those who find themselves living under its jurisprudence. But as for those who work to empower Allah’s law—“chief among them, the jihadis”—not only are they permitted to ignore Sharia, they are permitted to ignore basic standards of morality.

Hence the ancient and widespread appeal of the jihad.

Islam Death Cult

For the Sake of Islam

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , on December 10, 2012 by andelino
Bomber Abdullah Hassan al-Asiri

Bomber Abdullah Hassan al-Asiri

Not only did the original “underwear bomber” Abdullah Hassan al-Asiri hide “explosives” in his “rectum” to assassinate Saudi Prince Muhammad bin Nayef—they met in 2009 after the 22-year-old Asiri feigned repentance for his jihadi views—but this “holy-warrior” apparently had fellow jihadists repeatedly “sodomize” him to “widen” his anus to fit the explosives—and all in accordance with the “fatwa’s” of Islamic clerics.

A 2010 Arabic news video that aired on Fadak TV gives the details. Apparently a cleric, one Abu al-Dema al-Qasab, informed al-Asiri and other jihadis of an “innovative and unprecedented way to execute martyrdom operations: place explosive capsules in your anus. However, to undertake this jihadi approach you must agree to be sodomized for a while to widen your anus so it can hold the explosives.”

Others inquired further by asking for formal fatwa’s. Citing his desire for “martyrdom and the virgins of paradise,” one jihadi (possibly al-Asiri himself) asked another sheikh, “Is it permissible for me to let one of the jihadi brothers sodomize me to widen my anus if the intention is good?”

ass bomber

After praising Allah, the sheikh’s fatwa began by declaring that sodomy is forbidden in Islam.

“However, jihad comes first, for it is the pinnacle of Islam, and if the pinnacle of Islam can only be achieved through sodomy, then there is no wrong in it. For the overarching rule of [Islamic] jurisprudence asserts that ‘necessity makes permissible the prohibited.’ And if obligatory matters can only be achieved by performing the prohibited, then it becomes obligatory to perform the prohibited, and there is no greater duty than jihad. After he sodomizes you, you must ask Allah for forgiveness and praise him all the more. And know that Allah will reward the jihadis on the Day of Resurrection, according to their intentions—and your intention, Allah willing, is for the victory of Islam, and we ask that Allah accept it of you.”

Two important and complementary points emerge from this matter: 1) that jihad is the “pinnacle” of Islam—for it makes Islam supreme (based on a Muhammad Hadith); and 2) that “necessity makes permissible the prohibited.”

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Allah is our objective, the Quran is our law, the Prophet is our leader, Jihad is our way, and death for the sake of Allah is the highest of our aspirations.

These axioms are not limited to modern day fatwa’s, but in fact, were crystallized centuries ago, agreed to by the ulema, or Islam’s leading doctrinaires.

The result is that, because making Islam supreme through jihad is the greatest priority, anything and everything that is otherwise banned becomes permissible. All that comes to matter is one’s intention, or niyya.”

From here one may understand the many ostensible incongruities of Islamic history: lying is forbidden—but permissible to empower Islam; intentionally killing women and children is forbidden—but permissible during the jihad; suicide is forbidden—but permissible during the jihad, called “martyrdom.”

Indeed, the Five Pillars of Islam—including prayer and fasting—may be ignored during the jihad. So important was the duty of jihad that the Ottoman sultans, who often spent half their lives on the battlefield, were not permitted to perform the obligatory pilgrimage to Mecca.

More recently, these ideas appeared in different form during Egypt’s elections, when Islamic leaders portrayed voting as a form of jihad—leading to the abuse and even killing of those not voting for the Muslim Brotherhood.

According to these two doctrines“which culminate in empowering Islam, no matter how”—one may expect anything from would-be jihadis,” regardless of how dubious the effort may otherwise seem.

The World Trade Center towers after the second plane hit

The World Trade Center towers after the second plane hit

Even so, this “mentality,” which is prevalent throughout the “Islamic” world, especially along the front lines of the “jihad,” is the same mentality that many Western leaders and politicians think can be appeased with just a bit “more respect, well-wishing, and concessions from the West.”

Such are the great, and disastrous, disconnects of our time.

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Sodomy for Suicide

Originally published by the Gatestone Institute.

Quran 3151

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