Archive for election

Election Critics

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , on December 7, 2020 by andelino

Like American elections, critics of the North Korean regime have for years stated that the nation’s election process is riddled with fraud. But the people living under Kim Jong-un and Joe Biden can now feel relieved. After a thorough investigation, the FBI can confirm that there has never been evidence of voter fraud in Pyongyang or Washington.

A crack team of FBI agents browsed through all the files on their desks but no evidence of voter fraud was found. An FBI cyber-operations specialist spent the entire week browsing through all the files on his hard drive and windows folders before concluding that the allegations were baseless.

We can safely report according to Attorney General Bill Barr: “all claims of North Korean or American voter fraud are pure conspiracy theory.”


In collaboration with tech wizards the FBI has come up with a new aid in their relentless quest to uncover all instances of voter fraud. The new “Fraud Detection Goggles” will help these tireless “inquisitors of justice” to be even more effective in detecting and preventing voter fraud.

In a press release, an FBI spokesperson clarified the need for this new tool. “The wall penetrating laser-goggles we used during the Russia Collusion Coup, were a bit too sensitive. So we had to come up with something more suited to the task.”


These new hi-tech “crime detection goggles” will soon be used by all police forces in the country to sniff out American election thefts, left wing street violence, black-on-black killings and secret dealings with the communist party of China.

Meanwhile, Attorney General Bill Barr continues to hide his head in the sand and say there is no evidence of voter fraud.

The West is safe according to attorney general William Barr!

The real story behind AG Barr authorizing investigations

Election Horribilis

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , on November 29, 2016 by andelino

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I’m sure everyone remembers the Hillary rally video about accepting election results.

“That’s horrifying. That’s not the way our democracy works. We’ve been around 240 years. We’ve had free and fair elections and we’ve accepted the outcomes when we may not have liked them and that is what must be expected of anyone standing on a debate stage during a general election. President Obama said the other day that when you’re whining before the game is even finished it just shows you’re not even up to doing the job. “

She added, “And let’s be clear about what he’s saying and what he means. He’s denigrating—he’s talking down our democracy. I for one am appalled that somebody who is the nominee of one of our major two parties would take that kind of position. I truly doubt he has ever read the Constitution.”

Although not “horrifying” enough to prevent her from supporting “recounts” herself now that she’s lost “fair and square.”

Hillary Clinton’s campaign will “participate” in vote recounts of Wisconsin, Pennsylvania and Michigan if they take place in order to ensure the process proceeds in a manner that is fair to all sides.”

Because “fairness” is a core principle for “liberals” of all stripes and colors.

And I’m also sure you remember how “horrified” The Washington Post was when they “discovered” that Hillary “lost” because of Russian-backed “fake news sites” like Drudge.

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In yet another outbreak of “disappointus horribilis,” the snowflakes too are “horrified” that their preferred “candidate” lost. Even if they didn’t bother to actually drag their sorry asses to the polls to vote for her.

Thanks to “self-esteem” curriculum’s in place since their “conception” they’ve never experienced “loss” before.

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Perhaps I’ve become “desensitized” to all things “horribilis” over these past eight years or so, but I don’t find any of these things even “mildly” horrible; does that make me “deplorable?”

There is however one thing that still causes me to “quake” in my mukluks, the “thought” of having to look at this “mug shot” everyday for the next 4 years.

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That “cracks” me up and makes me proud of “crooked” Hillary who reminds us all of our “duty” to threaten democracy.

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The Democrats’ real strategy in launching recounts
What a difference an election makes
Trump calls Wisconsin recount a ‘scam’
Jill Stein’s vote count madness
If you think our trouble ended on November 8, think again
Watch your back, Donald: Hillary contests election results

Uncle Joe’s Massages

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , on February 19, 2015 by andelino

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Uncle Joe “Mensa” Biden clearly takes a “hands on” approach when it comes to his day job as “masseur.”

He loves to give “passionate” massages to “women” everywhere.

Those soft, “angelic” hands are making sure “ladies” all over the world feel the utmost “unwanted” pleasures only Uncle Joe can give.

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Uncle Joe fondling Ash Carter’s wife.

At Defense Secretary Ash Carter‘s “swearing-in” ceremony, Biden got all “touchy feely” with Carter’s wife, Stephanie.

From the pictures, it looks like he’s whispering sweet “Valentine’s” into her right ear while getting a good “whiff ” of her “sexy” body aroma.

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Military chief oblivious as Uncle Joe nibbles on wife’s ear.

She doesn’t necessarily look “uncomfortable,” but then again who “knows” what she was feeling.

Perhaps he was “trying” to be comforting after Stephanie’s “slip on the ice” at the Pentagon while “accompanying” her husband on his “first day” on the job.

In December, 2013, Biden “grabbed” the waist of “The Hill’s” White House reporter Amie Parnes at a White House “holiday” party.

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Clearly laughs were had by all. Happy holidays!

As she appeared to “protect” her underboob, he veered dangerously “close” to her abdomen. The picture “quickly” went viral.

Here are some “other” times Uncle Joe was “caught” squeezing and sweetly “murmuring” in ladies’ ears.

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Love your leather vest. Have you seen “50 Shades of Grey?”

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I need to pat you down to make sure you’re not carrying any weapons.

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Let me be “Secretary of State” when you win in 2016?

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Add me to your “Snapchat.”

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Kiss me, you’re Irish.

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Tell me, whose tie do you like better?

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The Brazilian “drought” has made me super “itchy.”

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Pledging to make every American woman “beach” ready.

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Seen by Obama regime as possible “legitimate” solution to “solve” the ISIS puzzle.

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With Uncle Joe’s “passion,” his love, his care, and above all his “massage” service to the Union, women will be thrilled to “vote” for Uncle Joe’s “erection” in the upcoming presidential “election.”

“Massaging” things, such as employment numbers and inflation statistics, is an “integral” and necessary part of today’s “collective” Leadership proving yet again the great “ability” of President Obama to gather only the “brightest,” most transparent, and most “handsy” adviser to his inner “cabal” clique.

As an added “bonus,” here’s a photo of Uncle Joe trading in his “sweet-ear-whisper” for a “sweet-kiss-on-the-head.”

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Joe Biden Needs a Tranquilizer Dart: Stephanie Carter Suffers the Veep’s Paws

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