Archive for apocalypse

Al Gore Apocalypse

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , , on January 5, 2016 by andelino

Global Warming 02

As the global warming fraud continues to garner support from the world’s political leaders, who recently jetted to Paris by the hundreds to affirm their need to “seize control and tax the world’s use of energy,” the bogus nature of the “evidence” for it continues to be exposed.

It’s time to roll out Saul Alinsky’s Rule #5:

“Ridicule is man’s most potent weapon. There is no defense. It’s irrational. It’s infuriating. It also works as a key pressure point to force the enemy into concessions.”

And who better to target than Al Gore, that “fat” profiteer, who has made a nine figure fortune off the “con game,” and who flies around in “private jets,” has multiple gigantic, “energy-sucking” houses, and is generally a pathetic “excuse for a seer.”

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Back when the “fraud” was widely accepted, Al made a foolish “prediction” that Anthony Watts of Wattsupwiththat.com is holding him to:

“On January 25th, 2006, while at the Sundance film festival, screening “An Inconvenient Truth,” Al Gore said this as chronicled in an article by CBS News:

The former vice president came to town for the premiere of “An Inconvenient Truth,” a documentary chronicling what has become his crusade since losing the 2000 presidential election: Educating the masses that global warming is about to toast our ecology and our way of life.

Gore has been saying it for decades, since a college class in the 1960s convinced him that greenhouse gases from oil, coal and other carbon emissions were trapping the sun’s heat in the atmosphere, resulting in a glacial meltdown that could flood much of the planet.
Americans have been hearing it for decades, wavering between belief and skepticism that it all may just be a natural part of Earth’s cyclical warming and cooling phases.

And politicians and corporations have been ignoring the issue for decades, to the point that unless drastic measures to reduce greenhouse gases are taken within the next 10 years, the world will reach a point of no return, Gore said.

He sees the situation as “a true planetary emergency.”

“If you accept the truth of that, then nothing else really matters that much,” Gore said in an interview with The Associated Press. “We have to organize quickly to come up with a coherent and really strong response, and that’s what I’m devoting myself to.”

That’s it. Few weeks from tomorrow, it is “all over for us,” because CO2 emission have continued to grow. Watts deploys the scientific data showing that the “Gore Apocalypse” is not developing in surface temperatures, killer storms, and the other indicia of doom.

Make no mistake. If a prominent “conservative,” much less a former VP and GOP presidential candidate, had predicted “doom” by a certain date, the media would “dog” that person everywhere, asking where is the “apocalypse?”

Global Warming 04

Gore has been keeping a “low” profile of late. Perhaps he is “diving” into his money bin? Or getting hotel room massages?

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I say let’s continue to “highlight the countdown.” We have only “until” January 25, 2016 before we all “burn in hell” according to Al.

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Screams surround everything, anxiety-ridden fear
Hundred piled corpses
Mixed with those alive, a rotten mess
Penetrated by death

In sludge of body parts crawl those who still breathe
Cold dead corpses
Crushed beneath still screaming bodies
Bowels gushed from wounds

Scream into pools of blood
Floats into a sea of death

Dead or buried alive
The skin burst underground
Suffocated by a hundred corpses
Broken bodies decompose

Erased from mankind’s history
Shoveledinto mass graves
When the victim is sent to eternal sleep
Still colored by fresh blood

Stream into pools of blood
Floats into a sea of death

The global warming consensus that isn’t
Al Gore Armageddon Clock About To Hit Zero After Ten Years

Holy Revelation

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , on June 22, 2015 by andelino

Holy Revelation 04

Since 2008, President Barack Obama, has been doing “yeoman” service keeping the sea levels lowered to save humanity from the harmful effects of “Hope and Change.”

Even though “Hope and Change” is good, Climate Change is not!

With super human effort, our “Glorious Leader” has kept the rise of the seas in check since we all know that New York City was predicted to be underwater by now, as reported in the 2009 by our “State Controlled Disinformation Collective” and only Obama’s super-human effort could have forestalled it:

And, now President Obama has found a “friend” in Saint Francis. The Pope has come to the “aid” of President Obama to take some of the “heat” off of his wide shoulders.

The Pope has released an encyclical “Apocalypse” designed to end “Climate Change” before “Next Tuesday!”

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The “Apocalypse” of Saint Francis in his own words…

“Unsustainable consumption coupled with a record human population and the uses of inappropriate technologies are causally linked with the destruction of the world’s sustainability and resilience. Widening inequalities of wealth and income, the world wide disruption of the physical climate system and the loss of millions of species that sustain life are the grossest manifestations of unsustainability. The continued extraction of coal, oil and gas following the “business as usual mode” will soon create grave existential risks for the poorest three billion, and for generations yet unborn. Climate change resulting largely from unsustainable consumption by about 15% of the world’s population has become a dominant moral and ethical issue for society. There is still time to mitigate unmanageable climate changes and repair ecosystem damages, provided we reorient our attitude toward nature and, thereby, toward ourselves. Climate change is a global problem whose solution will depend on our stepping beyond national affiliations and coming together for the common good. Such transformational changes in attitudes would help foster the necessary institutional reforms and technological innovations for providing the energy sources that have negligible effect on global climate, atmospheric pollution and ecosystems, thus protecting generations yet to be born. Religious institutions can and should take the lead in bringing about that change in attitude towards Creation.”

Holy Revelation 01

The “Catholic” Church, working with the leadership of other “religions,” can now take a decisive role by “mobilizing” public opinion and public funds to meet the “energy” needs of the poorest 3 billion people, thus allowing them to “prepare” for the challenges of “unavoidable” climate and Eco-system changes.

Such a “bold and humanitarian” action by the world’s religions acting in unison is certain to “catalyze” a public debate over how we can “integrate” societal choices, as “prioritized” under UN’s sustainable development goals, into sustainable “economic” development pathways for the 21st century, with projected population of 10 billion or more.

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The Pope’s answer to “Climate Change?” Collectivist Redistribution! Who would have thought of this biblical “Revelation?”

We can see the “End Times” right before our eyes!

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Pope Francis Leaps Aboard ‘Global Warming’ Bandwagon
The Pope’s Encyclical on Climate Change
Vatican Paper: Ditch Capitalism To Stop Global Warming
Dear Pope Francis: Please stay out of the climate change debate
Most Catholics Believe in Global Warming

Apocalypse_Horsemen_Pope_ClimateChange

Pope improves Armageddon with Climate Change Prophecy

Climate Apocalypse

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on May 20, 2014 by andelino

Climate Calamity 12

Climate world “experts” are up in arms today, many with their underwear “tightly” bunched, as a gigantic “blunder” was committed by a “staunch ally” of President Obama which threatens his efforts to “raise” taxes and “save” the planet.

On a recent visit to Washington DC, French Foreign Minister Laurent Fabiu told Obama and Secretary of State (Climate) John Kerry “we have 500 days to avoid climate chaos”, a profound statement which was supported by our own NASA study that we are past the point of no return.

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Danged “progressive” French amateur! You don’t make a “500” day prediction – ever! You make a “twenty” year predictions as a minimum. That way, “nobody” remembers when your “apocalyptic” prediction fails to come true just like all the others.

Looks like we have to “rescue” the French again.

These remarks came “less than a week” after the White House released its 829 page “National Climate Assessment” which introduced the term “climate disruption.”

“That idiot Fabiu, he wasn’t supposed to use ‘climate chaos’ yet!” screamed government funded “climate scientist” Al Gore while polishing his hockey stick at a leading research facility.

“We just started using ‘climate disruption’ last week and hadn’t even come “close” to getting all the money and regulations we wanted from it yet. Dammit!”

Climate Calamity 01

A colleague, highly credentialed “Climatologist” concurred: “Fabiu ruined our best new ‘synonym’ by springing it far too early. The only good one we have left to use is ‘catastrophe’. Good synonyms don’t grow on trees, you know. Thanks to idiots like him, nothing else will either!”

Many in the climate “science racket” downplayed the damage. World “renown” expert, Al Gore, addressed a UN conference on “sustainability” via telephone from his 10,000 sq. foot mansion, and told the “only-mildly-inebriated” delegates that there were still some good “synonyms” left to use, such as “calamity, meltdown or climax.”

Climate Calamity 04

“Besides”, continued Mr. Gore, as someone once said, “What’s in a name? Bullshit by any other name would still sell as sweetly.”

But others were not so sure. “You can’t use ‘calamity’ after you use ‘chaos’ and ‘catastrophe’,” said one Hollywood environmental activist during a “save-the-earth” orgy.

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“Climate science needs to start thinking out of the box on this”, stated Secretary of State (Climate) Kerry. Senator Reid suggested “Climate Koch Brothers.” I think he’s on the “right track” but I’m not sure it’s quite what we need at this “crucial” hour in earth’s history.

Climate Calamity 02

Many in the climate “movement” are pushing the idea of using a “phrase” instead of a “single” euphemisms.

“The problem has gotten much too big for just one word”, said a state-approved media climate expert. We’ve got to go bigger, something like “Totally Bad Climate Tea Party Storm” that would get the deniers’ attention.

But there are problems with that approach as well. “It wouldn’t fit on a bumper sticker” said one activist.” At least, not if you drive a “Chevy Volt.”

Climate Calamity 09

Finally the time has come in which we must now “cleanse” ourselves and save the earth from “total” obliteration. “Gays and Lesbians living together, plagues of sea turtles, storms, volcanoes, endless hurricanes,” all are predicted to happen by the “Goracle.”

Government control of “oceans, water, air, sunlight, real estate and personal income” must be taxed further to “offset the coming crisis,” which come to think of it is exactly what “progressive” Democrats have been promoting.

Climate Calamity 03

The “Goracle” has spoken and there is “no point” in debating it.

Well, there’s only one thing left to do. We need a “Days left till the World Ends” government online counter.

Without an online countdown of “awareness” how will we ever know, “once the world comes to an end,” that the world came to an end?

Climate Calamity 06

Ultimately, the final “decision” rests with the climate science community’s “spiritual” mentor, Climate “Scientist-in-Chief” Barack Obama.

Mr. President, the world awaits your “guidance” tweets…

Climate Calamity 11

Climate Alarmists in Denial
Climate Models Fail

 

Hunger Games

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , on January 7, 2014 by andelino

Hunger Games 00Consider “2013 the year of the Apocalypse”, as movie-goers spend the last of their dollars on a “dramatization” of a teen novel and its sequel with futuristic “gladiatorial” contests.

The “doomsday” atmosphere is, no doubt, brought about by the Republican “threats” to destroy the country.

Make no mistake, they can do it just by saying “certain” words, as we were reminded on the 50th anniversary of the Kennedy “assassination,” which was caused by the extremist rhetoric in Texas.

Going beyond “uncivil” words, Republicans forced the Democrats to vote for cloture, having Obama sign a bill that had “not one” Republican vote.

In a blatant display of “ideological intransigence,” Republicans were closing hospitals and blocked the expansion of Medicaid funds, as Sally Kohn claimed on CNN.com, in a story that started with “The ObamaCare website is open for business.”

According to Paul Krugman, Republicans were “Scrooges” causing 1.3 million American workers to lose “unemployment” benefits around Christmas “thanks to a perfect marriage of callousness – a complete lack of empathy for the unfortunate – with bad economics.”

Ruth Marcus gave Paul Ryan the Scrooge of the Year Award, and Leon Panetta declared the Republican Congress “the most difficult I’ve seen in 50 years of public service.”

The “apocalyptic” tone, however, was set by Maureen Dowd, the “grand-dame” of visionary writing at the New York Times.

Inspired by the Hunger Games, Maureen let her imagination run “wild into the future,” envisioning our nation’s post-sequester capital in 2084. The model city of Detroit, in contrast, shows us how Democratic policies can succeed in the absence of Republican opposition.

Upon reading Ms. Dowd’s column, I let my imagination run: “what will our future look like” if we let the academics and New York Times columnists “run” our world and “make” our decisions for us.

The “transformation” would truly be “fundamental.”

Hunger Games 01

For an “inspiring” back story, read Ms. Dowd’s “exiting” column:

“Welcome to Ted Cruz’s “Thunderdome”

Default Apocalypse

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , on October 18, 2013 by andelino

Default Apocalypse 00A Survival Guide To The Debt Ceiling Default Apocalypse

America may be on the verge of a default on its national debt.

There is no “good” reason for this default which could easily be “avoided” by the “insane lunatics” in Washington DC.

So what should we do, in the meantime, to prepare ourselves?

It’s a good question!

Right now, U.S. Treasury bonds are an important benchmark in the global economy.

Trillions of dollars of transactions depend on the security of these bonds.

The very definition of financial risk in much of the world is predicated on the notion that America will never, ever default on its debt.

Experts expect major bank failures, a collapse of various normally safe mutual funds and general chaos if the U.S. defaults.

At home, we would see an immediate government shutdown on steroids, as services go offline and the Treasury Department attempts to juggle the chainsaws as best it can to postpone the most dire effects of a default scenario.

President Barack Obama has a few “weird” options he can exercise as well.

A slew of legal scholars believe Obama can unilaterally raise the debt ceiling based upon the 14th Amendment of the Constitution, which states that “the validity of the public debt … shall not be questioned.”

Fans of quirky monetary tricks note that the president could also mint a trillion-dollar platinum coin, deposit it at the Federal Reserve, and keep the lights on indefinitely.

Obama, has, in the past, rejected both of these ideas, but if the debt ceiling calamity looks inevitable, he may have to revisit them.

Default Apocalypse 03

Nevertheless, the hour of debt ceiling darkness is drawing near.

Soon the government runs out of extraordinary measures and the state will begin failing to make good on its obligations.

Absent a congressional debt ceiling hike or Obama debt ceiling magic, the U.S. will be missing bond payments by the end of the month, plunging the world into turmoil and chaos.

How will you survive this new world order?

Well, you probably won’t.

Default Apocalypse  02

But here’s how to give yourself a “fighting” chance.

First, allow yourself to panic: Panic is inevitable, so just get on with it as quickly as possible. Let it wash over you. Cleanse yourself in its heat. Let the panic burn away all thoughts of the luxuries you once savored as a member of 21st century human civilization. Allow the fear to clarify things for you. Allow yourself to be reborn, as a person capable of things you wouldn’t have ordinarily thought yourself to be capable of. Bloody things. Once past your now outdated moral and ethical considerations, you are ready to begin.

You will probably want to heavily arm yourself: Those that already have done so will have a huge leg up in this department, so act fast and acquire sufficient armaments, and be prepared to use them. Alternatively, you can seek out the toughest, most heavily armed person you know and pledge your servitude to that person. You will want to make a very simple, very cogent case about what you have to offer this person in exchange for protection. Bear in mind that if you are a “political blogger,” there is probably no place for you in this new society. You should ask for the end to come quickly and painlessly.

If you work at a Medieval Times restaurant, you already have a bit of an advantage in navigating what our new feudal society is going to be like. And sadly, those weird Cross fit people are probably going to rise in the ranks fairly quickly.

Acquire the means to start fires as quickly as possible: Mankind has been taking its ability to just start fires at will for granted. After the default apocalypse, it’s going to get very hard. You should probably spend a sizable amount of your time over the next few weeks learning how to set fires without our modern means of doing so. Barring that, stockpile as many fire-starting implements as you can.

Cigarettes are a better hedge against the dollar than gold: Have you been buying gold? Wow, that was a big mistake! You are not really going to be able to buy anything with a commodity devoid of practical utility. It’s possible you might be able to trade gold for your life, if you are up against a particularly stupid warlord distracted by shiny objects. The new medium of exchange in the default apocalypse will probably look a lot like the one currently used in prisons, so consider cigarettes default swaps.

Carve a hole in the bottom of your mattress: Staying rested is essential and sleeping on the pile of cigarettes you horde before the crash can be rough. Smokes aren’t as comfy as a tempurpedic pillows, but they’re easy to hide from roving bandits when stuffed with care into a dug-out crater under your mattress.

Find a sturdy, non-rusty garbage can: You will probably need this to start fires in. Also, you can roll your junk around inside it.

Train and befriend a wolf: They will prove to be helpful companions and able watchdogs when society turns on itself. And chances are, an enormous amount of societal status will accrue to someone who can command the wolves at will.

Train and befriend a carrier pigeon: This is how you will “GChat” after the default crisis.

Befriend Liam Neeson if you can: Speaking of wolves, did you know that 80 percent of the movie “Into The Grey,” starring Liam Neeson, is actually just found footage from his real life, spent surviving arctic conditions and killing wolves with his bare hands? It’s true. Pledging your servitude to Neeson would be a really good move right now, especially if you find yourself having to face down the “Wolf Lord” clan for survival.

Get as many canned goods as possible: Food supplies won’t be immediately depleted. But they can’t be trusted. With food inspectors already furloughed and international trade likely to slow, expect a disruption in your normal diet. And prepare for the inevitable hunger pains. You’ll want to avoid tuna fish, because no one is coming to treat you for the mercury poisoning you develop after you’ve eaten a bunch of not-checked-by-food-inspectors tins of tuna. Also, while beans are hearty, you probably don’t want to stumble into your life in this new society with a reputation for flatulence.

Do you know how to farm anything? See, this is one of those skills with which you can bargain for protection. It wouldn’t be a bad idea to know how to hunt, either. Or to field dress a wild animal. Fishing is also a worthwhile skill to have. Basically, you’ll be spending your life growing and gathering food for your clan, so it would help if you actually enjoyed doing this stuff, too.

Buy survival seeds: As the Survival Seed Bank website notes, you can plant a “full acre crisis garden!” But you’d better do this within the protective barriers that your post-default liege erects to protect his holdings.

Buy fake survival seeds: You can give these to the guy who will try and steal your survivor seeds.

What to do about books? This is a judgment call. You probably won’t have much time to read that new Dave Eggers book, and carrying around a bunch of non-essential stuff is a no-go. Still it would be useful to help keep Western Civilization alive in some fashion. And everyone knows that Liam Neeson likes a good night read while being tucked into bed. Perhaps you can convince your liege to erect his fortifications around a library? You can argue that the library contains useful guides to basic latrine engineering and animal husbandry. Plus, in a pinch, you can burn the Twilight series — and any other “tween paranormal romance” novels — for warmth.

Duct tape is helpful: Seriously, duct tape is one of mankind’s most amazing creations, with more uses than you can even fathom. Stock up right this minute, if only to wrap around your hands for use as an alternative to the gloves that will be stolen from you.

Make sure you have a good pair of shoes: You’ll be moving around a lot, so make sure your shoes are sturdy and comfortable and solid in all sorts of extreme conditions. Think in terms of a good pair of Carhartt work boots — kick those Kenneth Coles to the curb. This is the post-default hells cape, not a fashion show.

Finally, leave that acoustic guitar at home: No one wants to hear your singer-songwriter bullshit right now.

Enjoy the “Default Apocalypse!”

Default Apocalypse 01

16 Ways Default Will Totally Screw Americans

 

Jim Bakker Show

Posted in uncategorized with tags , , , , , on May 17, 2012 by andelino

Do you remember the fallen televangelist Jim Bakker and his former wife, Tammy Faye? The disgraced televangelist is now hawking survivalist gear and books about the apocalypse on his website almost 20 years after he was released from prison on a conviction of bilking followers out of millions of dollars.

What kind of gift can you get for the budding survivalist in your life? How about a great big Jim Bakker food bucket? Back from the evangelical wilderness, Bakker now tapes a daily TV show from the rolling Ozarks of Missouri and uses his website to pitch what he calls “love gifts,” essentially a variety of odd products including “Tiffany style” jewelry, fuel-less “generators” and buckets of “dried food.”

For just $500, you can get “Jim’s All-American 4-Star Vegetable” buckets. A cool two grand will get you the “Jerry Jones Special,” which promises “over 3,300 servings of food and enough fuel to cook 480 meals.”

Preparing for the end of the world is nothing new for Bakker, who served almost five years in prison following his conviction for the $158 million rip off of his followers. “Pastor Jim,” as he calls himself now, published a book in 1998 called Prosperity and the Coming Apocalypse, which he sells on his site for $20 and proclaims: “This is not just a book of prophecy, it is a book of survival.”

His longtime wife Tammy Faye, having divorced him while he was in prison, Bakker married his new wife, Lori, the same year he published the book. She now works beside him as a pastor at the “Jim Bakker Show” and offers her own line of products like the “Lori’s Little Lambs Chrystal Necklace” for $35. Most of the goods, the Bakkers assure their followers, are at least partially tax deductible.

Watch out for those color changing chameleons and charlatans…

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