Chinese Rectal Swabs

Welcome to China!

American diplomats literally “Bend Over” (Wánliǎo) and spread their “derriere” cheeks for Chinese disease control experts to get a COVID “anal swab” tests upon arriving in Beijing.

Washington complained the “rectal” procedure was “undignified” and told staff to “decline” future test if asked to take one.

The Chinese government say the “anal swab” tests were given to US diplomats “in error” and promised to stop using “anal swabs” on American diplomats.

“The State Department never agreed to this kind of testing and protested directly to the Ministry of Foreign Affairs when we learned that some staff were subject to it,” a State Department spokesperson said.

“Beijing assured Washington that diplomatic personnel were exempt from the test, which was mandatory for incoming travelers in some parts of China.”

Foreign ministry spokesman Zhao Lijian told a daily news briefing in the Chinese capital: “To my knowledge China has never required U.S. diplomatic staff stationed in China to conduct anal swab tests.”

Chinese foreign ministry spokesman Zhao Lijian says the reports from Vice and Washington Post are false.

Some Chinese regions have been ordering anal swabs for people under quarantine, including those who arrived from abroad. Authorities say the tests can avoid missing infections.

It’s not clear how many U.S. diplomats or their family members have gone through the tests. The State Department spokesperson said it is committed to preserving the “dignity” of American diplomats and their families, consistent with the Vienna Convention on Diplomatic Relations and other diplomatic law provisions.

In an online post earlier, China’s National Health Commission said in some cases, the Wuhan virus can be more readily detected in anal samples than in throat and nasal samples. But it acknowledged rectal swabs are not suitable for mass use because they are inconvenient and unpopular.

According to the commission’s instructions, to collect test samples, the swab needs to be inserted about three to five centimeters (1.2 to 2 inches) into the rectum and rotated several times.

To collect the nucleic acid samples, the swab needs to be inserted about three to five centimeters (1.2  to 2 inches) and rotated several times.

After completing the motion twice, the swab is removed before being securely placed inside a sample container. The whole procedure is said to take about 10 seconds.

The “woke” Chinese anal testers began using the “derriere detecting method” more frequently during mass testing drives after a nine-year-old boy tested positive for the virus last month.

A video widely circulated online shows a doctor holding a visual demonstration of the procedure.

Reports about anal COVID-19 testing prompted a “wave of panic” on Chinese social media. A traveler from Australia to China who was given anal swabs in September said it felt like having diarrhea.

“Anal swabs” have been used in China to test the Wuhan virus since last year, but the method is mainly used in key groups at quarantine centers because of its inconvenience, according to a Chinese disease control expert.

Some Chinese cities used samples taken from the anus to detect potential infections amid stepped up screening during a spate of regional outbreaks ahead of the “Lunar New Year” holidays.

Tests using “anal swabs” can avoid missing infections as virus traces in fecal samples or anal swabs could remain detectable for a longer time than in those from the respiratory tract, Li Tongzeng, a respiratory diseases doctor in Beijing, told state television last month.

“Stool tests may also be more effective in finding infections in children and infants as their waste carries a higher viral load than adults” researchers at the Chinese University of Hong Kong said in a paper published last year. But the accuracy and efficiency of anal swabs remain controversial among experts.

Chinese Anal Testers.

Yang Zhanqiu, a deputy director of the pathogen biology department at Wuhan University, told state media Global Times that the nasal and throat swabs remain the most efficient test as the virus is proven to be contracted via one’s upper respiratory tract rather than the digestive system.

“There have been cases concerning the coronavirus testing positive in a patient’s excrement, but no evidence has suggested it had been transmitted through one’s digestive system,” Yang explained.

China has largely contained the pandemic; only a handful of cases are reported daily across the country of 1.4 billion people. Its relatively early recovery helped its film industry break records earlier this month during the Lunar New Year holiday, but the authorities remain wary of “foreign visitors” who could bring new outbreaks.

Assistant Secretary of Health Richard “Rachel” Levine.

Judging from the current crop of appointed diplomats by “Fraud-In-Chief” Joe Biden, I would be willing to bet that most of them enjoyed the “anal swab” experience.

It will be interesting if our illustrious Government leader, liberated from the oppressive binds of conservative ideology, will condemn the Chinese government for never offering a “Ginseng Colonic” after the anal probe.

Perhaps to avoid “gender norms” and wrap themselves in a cloak of moral superiority, it will become fashionable to display feathery “butt plugs” instead of decals or ribbons that inform everyone that you have been “anally” tested.

American diplomats in China complain they were forced to take anal swab tests for coronavirus

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