Big Nothing Burger

Hillary Clinton announced the “opening” of her national hamburger chain “Big Nothing Burger” at Hillary’s Burger “Shack” in Chappaqua, NY complimented with ample “Chardonnay” and jugs of frozen “daiquiris.”

Wearing a chef style “tin foil hat” and speaking “inebriated,” former presidential candidate turned “conspiracy” theorist, Hillary Clinton, revealed her 2016 inspired “Big Nothing Burger.”

The burger, “glazed” with Russian vodka and diced “organic” vegetables, grown in her “retirement” garden behind the “walled” in house, is said to be the “Biggest Nothing Burger” since the Hillary email scandal.


Contrary to the laws of “reality and basic common sense,” Clinton claims the “Big Nothing Burger” is calorie and carb free and “harmless” to the human body as her private “basement server” was to her recent presidential campaign.

She “vigorously” claims that any “bodily injury, illness” or otherwise negative reaction to the “Big Nothing Burger” should not be directed toward her but that all “responsibility and outrage” should be aimed at the “Commissariat of Kalorama, former FBI Director James Comey, the vast right-wing conspiracy, Wikileaks, the DNC, Russian spies and Covfefe.”

From her “continues” expanding list of 38 “Big Nothing Burger” recipes for losing to President Trump I “picked” my favorites.

  1. 1,000 Russian agents
    “If you look at Facebook, the vast majority of the news items posted were fake. They were connected to, as we now know, the 1,000 Russian agents who were involved in delivering those messages.”
  1. “Anti-American forces”
    “I take responsibility for every decision I made, but that’s not why I lost. Anti-American forces are going after our economy and they are going after our unity as a nation.”
  1. Content farms in Macedonia
    “You know, there’s all these stories of guys over in Macedonia who are running these fake news sites and I’ve seen them now and you sit there and it looks like a sort of low-level CNN operation, after decrying these Macedonia’s content farms.”

36.

   27.The GRU
“You know, basically the group running this was the GRU which is the military intelligence arm of the Russian military and they have a very sophisticated cyber operation. They are in bed with WikiLeaks, in bed with Goosefer, in bed with covfefe and in bed with DC Leaks.”

Here is the complete and ever expanding list of Hillary’s “CodeCon 2017” recipes for her “election loss” to President Trump. You can read the full “transcript” at Recode:

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