Fapping Ticket

A Female Democratic Texas lawmaker is “proposing” a bill that would require men to be masters of their own domain … or be prepared to “unload” $100 in fines.

Jessica Farrar reportedly filed House Bill 4260 … which proposes that in addition to “masturbation” fines it would require “rectal” exams before getting a “vasectomy, colonoscopy or Viagra prescription.”

Apparently she’s not near as “smart” as she thinks she is since Physicians “automatically” do a rectal “exam” before they even order a “colonoscopy!”

When it comes to “issues” related to health, state Rep. Jessica Farrar says that men should have to undergo the same “unnecessary” and “invasive” procedures that she says Texas women are “subjected” to under recently passed state laws.

That’s why the Houston Democrat on Friday filed House Bill 4260, which would fine men $100 for “masturbating” and create a required booklet for men with “medical information” related to the benefits and concerns of a man seeking a “vasectomy, a Viagra prescription or a colonoscopy.”

Women who “masturbate” are encourage to do so without “fear” of receiving a “fapping” ticket.

The bill would also let doctors invoke their “personal, moralistic, or religious beliefs” in refusing to perform an “elective” vasectomy or “prescribe” Viagra, among other proposed “requirements” in the bill.

While Farrar knows her “proposed (satirical) regulations” will not become law, she “hoped” the bill’s filing would at least “foster” a deeper discussion about what should be a “priority” during session years.

“What I would like to see is this make people stop and think,” Farrar told The Texas Tribune.

“Maybe my colleagues aren’t capable of that, but the people who voted for them, or the people that didn’t vote at all, I hope that it changes their mind and helps them to decide what the priorities are.”

Farrar said her bill, titled the “Man’s Right To Know Act,” takes the argument that “we’re looking at the sanctity of life,” a term that has already been highly “debated” this legislative session as several Texas Republicans have proposed “legislation aimed at abortions.”

“Protecting the life of unborn children should not be a controversial issue,” state Sen. Charles Perry, R-Lubbock, said last month.

In proposing a “fine” for masturbation, Farrar says that if a man’s “semen” is not used to create a pregnancy, “then it’s a waste … because that semen can be used  — and is to be used — for creating more human life.”

Farrar continued: “Men have to answer for their actions and so forth. So if there’s going to be an emission, it would have to be done in a hospital where the semen could be preserved for future pregnancies or it would be directly deposited into the vagina of a woman.”

“HB 4260” also calls for informed consent for elective “vasectomies, colonoscopy procedures and Viagra prescriptions.” Consent is informed only if at “least” 24 hours have passed since a man’s “initial” health care consultation for the “procedure or prescription.”

An outspoken proponent of “abortion” rights, Farrar has fought against Texas legislation mandating a “24-hour waiting period” between a required consultation and “receiving” an abortion, and another measure requiring women to have a “trans-vaginal” ultrasound while listening to the fetal “heartbeat” before murdering the baby, a measure Farrar says “messes with women’s heads.”

Farrar has criticized several “anti-women’s health bills” that have been filed this session, primarily a measure filed by state Rep. Byron Cook, R-Corsicana, that would require Texas hospitals to bury or cremate fetal remains and another by state Rep. Tony Tinderholt, R-Arlington, that would charge both abortion providers and women who receive an abortion with murder.

At a House State Affairs committee hearing, Cook was “challenged” by Farrar and other House Democrats who questioned “how his bill would impact women’s mental health and how much it would cost.”

Cook said his measure would create a “registry” of organizations that can help “pay for burial or cremation” of fetal remains. “That way, the cost associated with burials would not fall on women.”

“Let me be clear: this bill has nothing to do with abortion procedures whatsoever. It has everything to do with ensuring the dignity of the deceased,” Cook said. “We believe Texas can do better than this.”

In a statement, Tinderholt said Farrar lacked “a basic understanding of human biology.”

“I’m embarrassed for Representative Farrar,” Tinderholt said. “Her attempt to compare HB 4260 to the abortion issue shows a lack of a basic understanding of human biology. I would recommend that she consider taking a high school biology class from a local public or charter school before filing another bill on the matter.”

Farrar said the “filing of her bill” was necessary this session because the “other” bills directly targeted women’s “ability to make choices about their own bodies and care.”

She claimed that the “election” of President Donald Trump will add additional “hurdles” and that the “tone” regarding women’s health has gotten “worst” from years past.

“Especially with Trump as president, I think these folks are on fire now. They’re off the chain now,” Farrar said. “If they can elect someone based on making racist remarks and derogatory remarks toward women and such, then we’ve just given them license to offend and license to be even worse than before.”

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