Hillary’s Haircut Inequity

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The Clintons “claim” that in 2001 when they “left” the White House broke and destitute in a moving van stuffed to the “rafters” with $190K worth of stolen items, they were poverty stricken.

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Then, between 2001 and 2012, on “speaking fees” alone, the destitute couple managed to “stockpile” approximately $160 million dollars.

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With that kind of “haul,” who needs commemorative “china and cutlery?”

Anyway, now it’s 2016 and, thus far, Hillary watchers haven’t seen the former “penniless” first lady/current prosperous presidential hopeful wear the same “neutral burlap-like” outfit twice.

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Pregnant Grandma Hillary Clinton.

In fact, every time Hillary Clinton’s “bulging” eyes and stomach approach the podium, if you listen closely, besides the signature “barking and coughing,” you’ll hear a cash register “ring up” $1,400 for each and every Nina McLemore power “pantsuit” she shows up in.

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To go with those “pricey” getup’s, recently, while trawling in New York State for votes, Hillary proved she is the “champion of the middle class” when, early in the morning, she “snuck” into the side door Bergdorf Goodman’s John Barrett Salon.

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Once inside, and before getting a common women “haircut and blowout” for which she gladly “shelled” out $600 big ones, Hillary rode “solo” in an elevator like a “movie” star.

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Let’s not forget, it was Hillary who once said, “If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle.”

And by “spending” $600 on something that looks like it “cost” 20 bucks, Hillary did “just” that.

Not to “worry,” there is an “upside” to the story.

Later that morning, Clinton’s hair and outfit delighted her audience at the Apollo Theater where she “shrieked and pounded” the lectern like a butcher “flattening chicken cutlets.”

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Hillary’s new “hairdo” even went perfectly with the navy blue “leather” pantsuit she wore while talking trash and riding “shotgun” in a “five-car” motorcade that ran a “red light.”

But, the place that the feathered cut and the self-proclaimed “fashion icon’s” leather jacket really made an impression was at the “LGBT Fundraiser” in SoHo’s Capitale where both she and fat “lesbian” Rosie O’Donnell “mocked” Donald Trump and his hair.

Granted, it wouldn’t “hurt” if billionaire Trump dropped in on John Barrett for a slight “makeover.” However, it’s not Donald who talks up the “middle class” while spending $600 on a haircut – “it’s Hillary!”

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No one told Hillary John Barrett does The Donald’s hair.

Yes, Hillary Clinton is “part” of the 1% she is “always” criticizing. It’s Hillary who is the “antithesis” of her Democrat opponent Bernie Sanders who “never” combs his hair, let alone “spends” $600 in a haircut.

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As the Washington Free Beacon pointed out, Hillary’s new “coif” cost nearly 14 times what the average woman “pays” to have her hair done.

And, if Hillary “decided” to ask John to also cover those “telltale” greys, a process she admits she has had “done” for years, her morning “outing” to the 5th Avenue hair salon had to have cost her another $600.

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Six hundred dollars for “color” and $600 for a “cut” would bring Mrs. Clinton’s restyling tab to – “Cha-ching” –$1,200, which is $100 more than the “average” American earns a “week” which Hillary claims she’s “fighting” for,

Yet even though Mrs. Clinton amassed $9+ million in 2013 for speaking engagements alone, and although her daughter Chelsea “earned” $600K for an “entry-level” job at NBC, the former first lady remains “dedicated” to the cause of “pay equity.”

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However, based on how much she “plunked” down for her new coif, in addition to four “dead” Americans in Libya, and a cache of lost “confidential” emails, middle-class “haircut equity” is not a cause that “keeps” Hillary Clinton up nights.

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