Empress Hillary

Empress Hillary
By: Stella Paul

Hillary has already ordered the “diamond tiara and gold scepter” for her 2016 coronation, and a whole “village” of enslaved Chinese orphans is “weaving” her red carpet right now.

Sooner than you can say “Obama who?” Hillary will ascend to her rightful position of “World Empress.”

The optics will “dazzle” us. Adorned in a floor length cape made from the “dead cats” of Bill’s mistresses, she will “bless” us all from her 20-foot- platinum throne, “gifted” by our dear friends in Saudi Arabia.

True, she’ll be a bit long in the “tooth”, but a federal edict, upheld by the Supreme Court, will force us all to “wear” Google Glass.

Hillary’s face, devised by Hollywood “courtiers,” will appear as a clever blend of her own features, circa 1983, and Scarlett Johansson’s.

 A subtle “halo” will hover at all times.

Do you find this “vision” objectionable?

Fear not, for Empress Hillary will “care” for us with the tender ministrations she “lavished” on the abandoned, “slaughtered” Americans in Benghazi.

And should you find yourself “raped” in the ass and dragged through the streets by “screaming” Muslim mobs, be assured that Hillary will comfort your survivors by “jailing” an unknown filmmaker.

If that was good enough for an American “ambassador”, surely that should be good enough for you.

Now what “Royal Personage” do you picture reigning by her side? His Supreme Excellency Bill, chuckling amiably and “feeling” up the maids!

That’s been the “plan” all along, but we may be thinking too conventionally.

Give the Clintonians their due as “fearless” improvisers, able to maneuver and respond to the times.

Maybe we should prepare for a glamorous “Muslima Royal Regent.” Think “The Consort Wears Prada.”

Yes, Huma Abedin Weiner, a.k.a. Mrs. Carlos Danger, may deign to “co-rule” us yet.

If you’re having trouble following this story, let’s review the background I so helpfully laid out in September 2012 in “Bill and Hillary and Huma and Anthony.”

Describing “the vilest soap opera in American history” I noted, “This one’s got it all: two sham marriages, sexual perversions, and national treachery at the highest level.” 

The “Huma Comedy” now bewitching the media is an utter crock. The commentariat’s burning questions about the state of poor lil’ Huma’s marriage mask the cold hard truth: “There is no Abedin/Weiner marriage.”

There’s only a political deal brokered by the Clintons: “Weiner would marry Huma, Hillary’s top aide, to stop increasingly uncomfortable attention to Hillary’s intimate relationship with her. In turn, the Clintons would back Weiner’s bid to be New York mayor.”

When the pathetic Weiner committed a complete “twitter-ectomy” of his Congressional career, “The Plan” temporarily derailed.

But “scandals” that would force the rest of us to quiver in lifelong “shame” are mere temporary “annoyances” for these folks.

Weiner was soon back, “sexting” his wiener to “worshipful” females and running for the right of Honorable Flasher of New York, with the help of his lovely and “supportive”  bride.

And if it hadn’t been for that mean “slut” Sydney Leathers, they might have gotten away with it.

Of course, as the nation finds itself “transfixed” by Weiner’s very public “privates,” the media studiously ignores the real scandal: Huma Abedin is a Muslim Brotherhood asset, planted at the highest level of national power.

The invaluable Andrew McCarthy lays out the whole sordid shebang here, including how Secretary of State Hillary and Huma collaborated to “abandon” Israel, bring the “Muslim Brotherhood” to power abroad, and impose “Shariah-ism” at home.

But, in the words of our Presumptive Empress: “What difference at this point does it make?”  Hillary’s fixers will continue to smooth the path for Huma’s ascension to saintly wronged woman status, whose stoic “nobility” we must reward with our love.

As the Washington Post reports, “The chatter was, if you wanted to stay in Hillary’s good graces, you answer the call from Huma.”

Which brings us to “Plan B.”  The Weiner/Abedin farce may be past its “sell-by date,” but why not unleash a bold new plan?

Now that the Supreme Court has fast-tracked “gay marriage”, strongly “supported” by Hillary why shouldn’t she and Huma publicly “tie the knot?”

Two “wronged” woman, so strong and brilliant, “bravely” make a new future together, because they have so much “love” to give each other and the world.

How “lucky” we are to have them!

Vote for these magnificent “trail-blazers and make history!”

But wait a minute, you say.

What about “Bill?” Well, “nature” might take its course and Bill could “succumb” in the arms of a particularly “nubile” female receptacle.

Or maybe he’ll agree to a “friendly” staged divorce, in which he’ll get a “piece” of the action.

The obedient media will shriek at us about the Clintons’ awe-inspiring maturity at handling difficult life transitions and harangue us into learning important “Life Lessons” from them and “worshiping” them even more.

Or maybe Bill will join Huma in the White House for a “New Paradigm Three-Way.”  After all, our moral betters will lecture us, “What is a family village” anyway?

Perhaps Bill will “donate” the goods for Huma to get “pregnant” and the whole world will celebrate the birth of “Baby Mohammed” in the White House.

There’s just something about Huma…her deep, sparkling brown eyes… those waves of soft, black, glowing hair… those sexy, pouting, and luscious lips… her sensuous smile…those close ties to the Muslim Brotherhood…and her past with Al Qaeda publications and financiers.

You “don’t” want Huma in the White House? “You are a Homophobe! Racist! Islamophobe! Hater! Bigot! Right-wing Christian!”

This “Clintonista” bunch didn’t get where they are through “failure” of nerve.

Stella Paul’s new eBook is “What I Miss About America: Reflections from the Golden Age of Hope and Change”, available at Amazon for just $1.99.

Write Stella at Stellapundit@aol.com